Monday, November 9, 2015

Mercy.

For a few weeks now, I've found myself begging the Lord for mercy. I'll admit that I often spend a lot of time thinking about His grace, but never really contemplate or ask for His mercy. Recently, though, I've felt like a kid on the playground, lying face-down in the dirt, crying "uncle" as she continually gets pummeled by all things big and mean. 

It hasn't been pretty, and I've not been the prettiest person to be around. In fact, a few nights ago at dinner we were comparing each other to Dr. Seuss characters and, without hesitation, Ethan boldly and bravely stated that I would be The Grinch. About fifteen minutes later, Jeramie found me upstairs, sobbing on our bed. Who knew a six-year-old could give his mama such hurt feelings?! 

(I had wine with a friend later that night.)

But, back to mercy.

These days are HARD, y'all. On any given day, I feel as if the walls are closing in on us and we'll never escape the madness. The noise level in our home remains at a constant nails-on-a-chalkboard level, and someone is always running, crying, needing their bottom wiped, wanting to eat, asking a question, sitting in time-out, fighting sleep, fighting over a toy, fighting for attention. Fighting, fighting, fighting! Some days, Jeramie gets home from work and finds me all but curled up in the fetal position, rocking in the corner. 

One night, after a particularly difficult day, Jeramie was praying before bed and the only thing I remember him saying is, "Lord, have mercy."

Have mercy. Throw us a bone. Give us a break. Have compassion on us, Lord!

After praying that prayer for a few days, it become clear through a variety of people and ways, that we needed to take a break. I was craving space to breathe, to think, to rest. I wanted to stand on the shore of a massive ocean and be reminded of how small I am compared to my great, big God. I wanted to be dazzled by the rising sun and reminded of His faithfulness. I needed time away from the kids, and time with my husband.



So we did just that.


We left the kids in the care of family and friends and spent two uninterrupted, restful days on the coast of our beautiful state.


And it was amazing.



And the mercy the Lord showed us over the course of one weekend sweetened His goodness and softened our hearts.


He renewed our spirits and strengthened our bodies for this race we're running.


And we didn't deserve it.


But He gave it to us anyway.


Because He loves us and He hears the cries of His children.


And His mercies, just like the rising sun, come abundant and free every morning. 


Yes, Lord, we are thankful.


The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; 
his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; 
great is your faithfulness.
-Lamentations 3:22-23


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