Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Extubation

This morning, around 10:15, Ethan was taken off of the ventilator through a process called extubation. We weren't able to see him for a while after the procedure, so I went down to the pump room to do my thing. Around 12:00 Jeramie texted me to say that he was in the room with Ethan. I basically ran to the unit to go see my little boy!

When I walked in, Jeramie had a pained look on his face and my eyes instantly darted to Ethan. He was trying his best to cry, but his voice sounds very raspy from having the tube in place for so long. I also couldn't help but notice the blood coming out of his mouth. I got sick to my stomach and began imagining the worst. It turns out they think he has a cut in his mouth from sucking/biting on the tube. They don't know this for sure, so my mind is still racing with all the things it could be. I sat with him for about 10 minutes. I started to break down, then Jeramie reminded me to stay strong for him. I made it about 2 more minutes before I had to leave the room. I couldn't stand to see him bleeding, trying to cry, and what seemed like in pain.

As I was in the middle of typing this, Jeramie came out to tell me that they had decided to re-intubate him. His x-ray showed that parts of his lungs had collapsed and he wasn't doing as well off the vent as they had hoped. We were prepared for this possibility, but it's still upsetting. I don't like knowing that he's bleeding and we don't know why. I don't like that they have to re-insert the tube.

I'm frustrated, scared, mad, and sad. Pray for strength, peace, and healing for our son.

16 comments:

Scott and Kristen said...

Praying for you all!

traci said...

Holy God, Healer, life giver, redeemer, peace maker, comforter, please bring peace to Ethan, Joye & Jeramie in this moment. Please ease the pain in their hearts (literally and figuratively). We pray for miraculous healing for Ethan and for your presence to be ever real for all of them today. Thank you for your love and grace.

Taylor Barbour said...

Joye,
As I read your updates, my heart continues to turn to God. A passage in Psalm 28 kind of sums it up, may it give you the strength you need:
Praise the Lord! For he has heard my cry for mercy. The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving.
Psalm 28:6-7
Praying for you, Jeramie and Ethan.
Love, Taylor

Sarah said...

I couldn't tell you the last time we spoke or saw one another; I can't really remember how I ran across your blog, possibly through facebook. I have become addicted to reading about you, your family, and this AMAZINGLY strong little boy. I cry for you, and I can't really remember the last time I cried like this. I pray for you guys and throughout the day I realize my mind has gone back to you and your family. We have our own little family of three with a little boy (Oliver) who is 7 1/2 months old. I honestly do not know what I would do if we were faced with your situation, I don't think I could be as tough as you. It seems you have a fantastic husband and the two of you together have already discovered what it is going to take to be great parents. I want you to know I am only about 30mins from Raleigh/Durham, and I know you have plenty of wonderful family support but I would be more than happy to help you out any way I can. I know time is precious so I will end here. I plan on sharing your story with as many people as possible to keep those prayers going up. You have no idea how your family's story has already touched so many hearts.
Sincerely,
Sarah Matthews Durham

Lisa said...

Remember, Ethan is a fighter! He will get through this. You and Jeramie will get past this momment, this day, this hurdle. We are ALL praying and I know that God hears us ALL! Much love...

Christie Smith said...

oh honey..... My heart breaks for you, know you can get through this... Ethan will continue to improve! We serve a faithful and mighty God that can heal all wounds... I pray that he gives you strength and peace and I pray that Ethan continues to improve, God can do all things and he holds you in the palm of his hand.... I wish I were there with you!

Amanda said...

Joye and Jeramie- I have no words but know that people are praying for the healing of Ethan's lungs and vocal cords. I pray that you soon hear the sweet sound of his cry.
Father- be with Joye as she goes through this battle. This isn't fair God, but we know that you are good and make all things good. Be with Jeramie's heart as he tries to be strong for Joye and Ethan. We give Ethan to you Lord, heal him.

Emily Mitchell said...

We're praying for you -- for peace and healing. Love you guys!

Anne said...

Praying for this precious family. Love, Anne

April said...

Hey Joye, this is April Thomasson Crist. Jesse just gave me your blog address. After reading from start to finish I am amazed, what a wonderful christain mother you are. I am going to forward your blog to my mom and Irene. We are going to add to the prayers that are already going out for your family. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. Even if it is just a sandwich from the Village Deli or a milk shake from the Circus. Thanks to my dad I know the way to Duke by heart. What a beautiful baby boy!

Anonymous said...

We can't imagine how difficult this must be for you two. Our thoughts are with you often and we pray for healing. We can't wait to meet little Ethan once he's up for it.

Michael and Tiffany Armstrong

Anonymous said...

Dear Joye and Jeramie,
I think of your precious child and the two of you all day. I have been praying for Ethan and the two of you to stay strong. Joye, the way you write about everything that the three of you are going through is just so vivid to me. Knowing that you are so real and put forth (for the rest of us to experience) your true emotions is inspiring. I hope you find your evenings not just reflective, but peaceful. I pray that you both are sleeping, and finding comfort in the little progress that may occur for just that tiny minute. The fact that Ethan was able to get off the vent is awesome. He will do it again, and I promise...you will have a picture of him with his hand on the tube letting you all know that he is ready! I love you guys and hope you are well!
Carrie

Janet Fuller said...

As soon as I read your blog "Extubation" I immediately sent an email out to our friends at church to pray for Ethan regarding his breathing, his lung, his bleeding.... and from continued strength... along with a request for strength and continued grace for you and Jeramie. Try to quote the promises of God when you are mad, and sad, and worried etc. And know that when you are weary that so many others everywhere are praying continuously for you, lifting each of you up to our Holy and Righteous Father.

Janet said...

You are all still lifted!

Jessica Davis said...

I can't stand to see you upset Joye. I hate that I can't be there physcially every day. I miss you guys already. I know Ethan is going to turn this all around and get so better so soon. We're all praying for Ethan's health and strength, and for yours and Jeramies mental strength as much as being able to physcially handle the stress (and hotel beds). Always remember God has an amazing plan for your wonderful family. Me and mama were talking on the way home last night how much y'all have grown! I remember the morning you called me to tell me I was getting a brother in law, the night I received a Shamu toy with a "To: Aunt Jessi" tag and realized what was happening WAAAAY before anyone in the room!, to the day not too long ago you called to tell me your water broke! Blessings come in CRAZY disguises and this has helped me realize life is happening day to day. As much as you and I try to sit down and plan how everything is going to happen, it doesn't always go that way! I love you and I'm here no matter what or when. You can always call me when your pumping if you need a singing partner (if your other one is sleepin!) I love you and I can't wait to see my nephew, sissy, and bro so soon. Give Ethan kissies for me!

Tara Ashton said...

Joye,
I am praying for your sweet family. I have been praying for little precious Ethan. I pray for his little miraculous heart and his strong fighter body that it would continue to fight and respond as he has been to these procedures and treatment. I pray that he would be healed and rejoice in that you two are such amazing devoted parents already. Like others, I cry over Ethan and ask God why. I pray that God grant us patience as we wait to understand his plans. Ethan is lucky to have parents like you both. You may not feel strong right now, but you are, stronger than you know. I pray that God continue to show you how to be strong and to give you peace as he takes your worries and deals with them one by one.

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